Entry Number 86 � January 154th, 2002
July 03, 2002 ~ 9:07 p.m.
To all my loyal readers (and, shall I assume, friends?) here on Diaryland: You know I appreciate you. You provide me with entertainment on a regular basis and I hope I provide the same service in return. Some of you have even proven yourself to be very supportive. So, I was wondering if you�d help me out with something:
Could you please, please stop bitching about your summer weather? Right now, this is the best thing you could possibly do for me.
It has been one long, perpetual winter here in London. It�s been more like an Arctic summer. I know now why Eskimos, Scandinavians and other far north peoples love to drink. It�s to escape the reality of living in the land of no summer. Oh, I do sympathize!
Instead of waking up to pleasantly warm mornings full of birdsong, I bear witness to dead quiet, ominously cloudy daybreaks. The days themselves never get much better. A good day is when you get the odd spot of sunshine and temperatures that actually manage to make it to 70 � which hasn�t been that often. And even that is far too cold for a high temperature. Where I�m from, 70 degrees is an overnight low reading.
I spent a dark, cold, rainy, windy winter dreaming of summer. And now here it is, July, and it�s still dark. Still cold. Still rainy. And still goddamn windy. It�s like January, only the trees are green. It�s safe to say that I�m feeling really cheated and incredibly pissed off. I have absolutely had enough of this, I�m beginning to totally lose my mind, and yet there�s still no warmth in our forecast as far as the meteorologist�s eye can see.
And, to make matters even worse, when I log into Diaryland to do some reading, I am confronted with people complaining about how awfully hot and dreadfully humid it is and how they can�t stand it. Well, gee, will you imagine that � perfectly normal summer weather during the summer! Wow, I am just simply lost for words, man!
So the next time any of you out there in Utah, Kansas, Wisconsin, Ohio, New York, my hometown of Boston, or wherever the hell else I happen to know you from, want to complain about how bad you think you�ve got it, spare a moment for hapless motherfuckers like me who are stuck in Never, Never Summer Land. If clouds, wind, rain and temps in the 50s every single day is your idea of a good summer, then grab a number and await your turn in the loony bin.
And what amazes me is that most of you come from northern climates. I do hope you�ll remember the next time you�re picking ice from your windshield and shivering like a vibrator, that summer is short-lived enough as it is. Winter is always longer and far more brutal. You�ll all be wearing anoraks before you know it and wondering where summer went. You won�t even notice how quickly it came and left because you spent most of your time complaining about it! Enjoy what you�ve got while you�ve got it, folks! I don�t give a damn how hot and humid it is � shut up and deal with it, it�s better than freezing your ass off.
Thanks for listening. Now, excuse me, I�ve got to go put another log on the fire and burn the calendar that dares to suggest that it�s July.
� M.E.M.
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Copyright � 2001-2007 by M.E. Manning. All material is written by me, unless explicitly stated otherwise by use of footnotes or bylines. Do not copy or redistribute without my permission.
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