HeY, hoWs� yoUr l0vE muscLe shutthefuckup�
March 19, 2004 ~ 8:35 p.m.
If there�s one thing I can�t stand�the one thing that really makes me wince�it�s referring to a penis as a �love muscle.�
However, that�s all I practically ever read among the subject titles of the many junk mails I receive:
�Frustrated 0ver the size of y0ur l0ve muscle? Sbhjucx� You know, shit like that.
Honest to God, what do these spammers expect? That I, or any sane man, is going to write back, pleading, �Oh yes, yes, please help me. PLEASE! Yes, girls do laugh at me, yes, it is small, yes, I am very concerned about it. I want a new love muscle, damnit, please help!�
Even if I gave a goddamn about sex, which I don�t�give me good music, good marijuana, a good work-out, or ten hours in which to do absolutely nothing but sleep instead (the wife, in case you�re wondering, agrees whole-heartedly, though she would ask for good codeine instead of marijuana)�what makes them think I�d confide in someone I don�t even know and can�t write a consistent title line without using zeros for the letter O, and without apparently hitting many keys at random at the end of their sentence?
Why don�t they just worry about their own �love muscles� instead and stop annoying me with that gross, irritating phrase?
� M.E.M.
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Copyright � 2001-2007 by M.E. Manning. All material is written by me, unless explicitly stated otherwise by use of footnotes or bylines. Do not copy or redistribute without my permission.
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